


Decisions by Casey

by Legion FanFic Archivist (Hanofer)



Category: Legion of Super-Heroes (Comics)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-05
Updated: 2015-12-05
Packaged: 2018-05-05 04:23:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5361260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hanofer/pseuds/Legion%20FanFic%20Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Era: Classic. The so-called "Magic Wars" are finally over. Now, all that's left for the Legion of Super-Heroes to do is assist with repairs, tend to the needy...and deal with their own personal losses.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Decisions by Casey

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: None of the characters used in this story are mine. They are owned by DC Comics. I am merely using them in an attempt to entertain, although I am receiving no money for this. I would like to thank all my fellow Legion fans on the List, but especially Dannell, Tiril and Christian, all of whom constantly encourage me to keep at it. Thanks, all!

Within the LSH headquarters at Weisinger Plaza, in the room belonging to the hero called Ultra Boy, Jo Nah sits in darkness, endlessly turning his Legion flight ring. Usually, to his fellow members, Jo would never be what one considered morose. His fighting spirit and upbeat attitude has inspired many of his friends in the past, helping them all to overcome times of despair. Even when teammates have fallen in battle, he has always managed to cope with the loss and move on with his life, assisting others to do so as well. This time, however...this time is different.

"Jo?"

He hears the soft voice whisper. Somewhat surprised that he was so overwhelmed in memories, he did not even hear her enter.

"Jo? It's so dark in here, honey. Of course, we don't have the luxury of automatic lighting right now. Let me just turn on some lights..."

"NO!!"

The sudden shout booming out of the darkness startles the young woman and she quickly, fearfully, withdraws her hand from the lighting panel. She has faced many villains and monsters in her time with the Legion, yet none of them caused her as much fear as the hurt and anger in her lover's voice. Visibly shaken, she stands in the doorway, silhouetted by the bright lights of the hallway behind her.

"I-I'm sorry, Tinya. I'd just...I'd just rather stay like this for now, okay?"

Steeling herself with a deep breath, the woman called Phantom Girl slowly walks into the room, intentionally leaving the door open. The light falls across his face, and before he turns away from it she notices dried streaks running from his eyes down his cheeks. She has never seen him like this before, not even when Kal-El died. Before speaking, she makes a conscious effort to steady and lighten her voice.

"Sure, hon. It's just harder to see that gorgeous face of yours this way, that's all...."

Even she can hear how forced her attempt at frivolity sounds, and a rueful glance from Jo confirms its failure.

"Tinya, please. We've never lied to each other before, let's not start now, okay?"

As she sits beside him on the bed, her hands instinctively go to his broad shoulders and back, as they have many times, on many nights. This time, however, rather than pull him into a lovers' embrace, they wrap around him protectively, as if their warmth alone can banish whatever is troubling him so deeply. Jo's strong hand squeezes hers, and she feels his jaw tighten against her chest as he fights back fresh tears.

"Jo...Jo, what's wrong? Everyone's concerned about you. It's all I can do to keep Cham from slithering under your door, and Shady's going crazy worrying about you! You've been like this since we got back from the Sorcerers' World. Did something happen that...?"

Suddenly, he jumps up and throws his flight ring across the room. It bounces off the wall and lands at her feet.

"'Did something happen'?!? 'Did something happen'?!? In case you've forgotten, Tinya, Magnetic Kid died back there! He died unlocking that sprocking barrier that kept us off-world! Don't you remember???"

"Of course I do! I was there, too, remember? I almost died trying to get through the barrier, myself, until you saved me!"

Tinya rises angrily from the bed, then stops herself. She sees the slumped shoulders and shaking fist of her lover and curses herself for letting her own anger and sadness get the better of her.

_Easy, Tinya. Jo isn't angry with me, he's upset about Pol's death. We all are, of course, but Jo seems to be taking it harder than he should be. There's got to be something more to this,_ she thinks.

Hesitantly, she crosses the room and gently places a soft hand on his arm.

"Honey, you've got to let me help you. I know you like to play 'big, strong hero', but it's obviously not working this time. Please...tell me what's wrong...."

He turns to face her, the hallway lights illuminating his face fully, and she gasps, visibly startled by her first clear sight of him in days. The drawn cheeks and absolute sadness in his eyes breaks her heart. She reaches out to embrace him, but before he can respond, Timber Wolf comes running to the doorway.

"Jo?? You okay? I heard a crash and..."

"He is fine, Timber Wolf. At least, physically."

Timber Wolf spins to see Sensor Girl standing behind him. "Huh? Jeckie? But I heard..."

"I know what you heard, my friend. But this is something that Ultra Boy...and his lover, if he lets her...must deal with himself. Come, let us leave them in peace."

"But... But... Aw, hells! I don't think I'll ever get used to your new 'one-with-the-universe' shtick, Jeckie!"

As the lupine hero stomps off, mumbling under his breath, Sensor Girl smiles underneath her facemask. Despite herself, there are times when she actually enjoys the consternation her new persona elicits. Not for the first time, she realizes how right it feels to be back amongst her friends. Before leaving, she turns to face Jo and Tinya.

"Ultra Boy...Jo..."

They turn, a small smile on Phantom Girl's lips.

"Yes, Jeckie?"

"Jo, do not let this guilt and anger continue unchecked for long. If you continue down this road, you may never find your path back to us again, and we would all be the sadder for it. You must fight these demons, with every ounce of strength you possess. Believe me, I know. The only difference being, you have someone to help you shoulder the burden, whereas I did not. It would be the height of foolishness for you to turn away from her love and assistance. Be well, my friends."

With the regal bearing that is her birthright, the former Princess Projectra leaves her teammates, never noticing the tears pooling in Phantom Girl's eyes. Seconds later, his head down, Ultra Boy walks solemnly over to face his beloved.

"I-I did save you, didn't I?"

"Of course you did. You always do."

"Yeah, I guess. I mean, that's what we do, right? Save people? Save...each other?"

Slowly, realization begins to dawn in Tinya Wazzo's mind.

"Jo... Honey, you couldn't have saved him. We all tried to reach him, but Pol had his mind made up. He chose his own path. Even Brek couldn't convince him to come back."

For seconds that seem like an eternity to her, he is silent. Then, he looks directly into her eyes, almost daring her to argue with him as he responds.

"Tinya, since when is Polar Boy faster than a guy with super-speed?"

It is a simple question. A simple question with, she knows, a simple answer. It is something that, although she could not bring herself to admit it until now, has been gnawing at her since the Wars ended. And she knows there could only be one answer.

"He... He isn't."

Now, she can hold back the tears no longer. Although too strong to break down completely, she feels the warm drops slide slowly down her cheek. She hears the catch in Ultra Boy's voice as he agrees.

"You're right; he isn't. Thank you for not trying to spare my feelings by making up excuses. We both know that, out of all the Legionnaires present, I had the best chance to catch him before he...before he killed himself."

Slowly, she raises her head and takes his face into her hands.

"Then why didn't you, Jo?"

Gently, he takes her hands away and stands. Crossing the room, he picks up his ring and begins nervously tumbling it between his fingers again. His face is pained, as if he is struggling with the answer to her question.

"At the time, I thought I had a good reason. Now, after the fact, and after seeing Rokk's face... I-I don't know. Tinya, I just don't know."

"Jo, you've got to try and explain this to me. You know I love you, but now that it's out in the open, I've got to understand this. One of your powers is super-speed. Why didn't you use it to save Magnetic Kid?"

He winces at the words. Spoken outright, they sting even more. Taking a breath, he tries to explain.

"Because...because he made his decision, and I thought I had to respect it. Tinya, it was no secret that Pol was always trying to measure up to his brother, Rokk. He never quite felt that he was as good as his big brother, that he was anything other than a lesser version of him. I know exactly how he felt. So, when he made the decision to give his life to open the lock, I...I let him do it. Sure, I kept pace with all of you flying after him, but I didn't pour on the speed because it was his choice, his moment."

"But, there might have been another way...!"

"At the time, I didn't think so. I mean, Jeckie was the only one of us who had any chance of understanding what was going on, and she herself said that one of us had to die to get beyond the barrier. Element Lad was all set to go, just like all of us would have, but then Pol flew off. In that split second, I decided to respect his decision and...let him go. But now?... Gods! Tinya, it was the first time I ever just stood by and let someone die! What if I was wrong? Maybe there was another way! I don't know!"

Suddenly, his super-strong fist crashes through the wall. Then, the muscular young man breaks down, collapsing onto his knees, sobbing like a child. Tinya rushes to her lover's side, wrapping him within her own body, swearing to herself that she will get him through this.

"Shhhhhhhh... It's okay, honey, it's okay. Don't do this to yourself. It's okay...."

Soon, the sobs have finally subsided and Ultra Boy sits curled on the bed, his body pressed against hers. Running her fingers through his dark brown hair, she looks at his face. It is a face she has stared at many times. A handsome face, one that she knows could never intentionally let a teammate harm himself without some kind of reason. Although she hates the idea of causing him more pain, she knows that there must be more. There is something he said that has stuck in her mind, something that might shed more light on the situation.

"Honey, before you said that you knew exactly how Pol felt. What did you mean?"

For a moment, his entire body tightens. Then, he speaks, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Even after all my years with the Legion, there are still times that I feel like a second-rate Superboy, or a second-string version of Mon-El."

"What...? Jo, that's nonsense! They've never said anything..."

"Oh, I know neither one of them would ever say it, honey. None of the others would, either. But sometimes, things are said without thinking. Things that remind me that anything I can do, they could do better."

"Jo, I've never heard anyone say anything like that."

She does not see the grin that plays across his mouth. Trying to keep an accusatory tone out of his voice, he asks a question.

"Oh, really? Honey, how many times have you said to me 'Without Superboy and Mon-El here, you're the strongest Legionnaire we have'?"

Phantom Girl is stunned by the question, and also at the flashes of memory that prove the correctness of it. A sudden wave of guilt and remorse washes over her.

"But, Jo, I didn't mean..."

"Shhhhhhhhhh. I know you didn't, honey. Really, I do. It's just little things like that that remind me of how my powers basically copy theirs, that's all. So, it was probably easier for me to understand how Pol felt about living in Rokk's shadow. I guess that was in the back of my mind when he flew off. I couldn't be the one to deny the kid his chance to get out from under Rokk's shadow and prove himself."

Her arms tighten around him, and she kisses the soft, sweet-smelling hair on his head.

"I understand now, honey. I just wish you had told me all this sooner! You know how valuable you are to all of us, don't you? You know how much we all care about you, for yourself?"

"Well, yeah, I guess so, although Polar Boy hasn't even spoken to me since we got back. Pol was his friend; I'm sure he's wondering why I didn't do more, too. And I can't even bring myself to face Rokk..."

"Then I guess I'll have to face you."

The two of them jump off the bed at the familiar voice. Seeing the face in the doorway, Jo tenses instinctively. Tinya silently curses herself for not insisting that Jo seal the door.

"Rokk!"

"Hi, P.G."

"Rokk, I...I..."

"Jo, relax. I'm not here to fight with you, or to accuse you of anything. Mind if I come in?"

The two lovers glance at each other, slightly confused. "Sure," says Ultra Boy.

"I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but I was on my way to see you and I heard most of your conversation just now. Hmph! It's funny; Jeckie's been keeping us all away from this area for a while, but she suddenly called me and said I could come see you now. Weird."

Tinya grins.

"Anyway, like I said, I heard your reasons for letting my brother go...and I wanted to thank you."

"What??? Thank me? Why?!?"

As he talks, Cosmic Boy begins to nonchalantly replace fallen objects from Jo's earlier outburst, magnetically lifting and returning statues, holo-frames, and other items to their proper place. Tinya knows her friend well enough to realize that it is his way of focusing on something, enabling him to get through this discussion about his brother.

"Pol has always looked up to me, wanted to...be like me. That's one of the main reasons he joined the Academy, then replaced me in the Legion itself."

For a moment, a faraway look crosses the handsome features, as if he is remembering...and regretting?...something. Then, Rokk continues.

"What he never really understood was that, by taking my place on the team, he was setting himself up to constantly compare himself to me. Even when the others gave him a chance, he couldn't think of anything but how he measured up to my years on the team, and no matter what he did, he always found himself wanting. At least, until you let him prove himself."

Cosmic Boy walks over to Jo and puts both hands on the broad shoulders.

"Jo, I know my brother. I loved him more than anything, and he was a great Legionnaire, but he would have made himself miserable here, constantly trying to measure up. Yet, he was too stubborn to leave, either. Just like he was too stubborn to let Element Lad or anyone else take his place at the lock. As difficult as it was for me to realize, he probably would have done something stupid eventually, getting himself...or someone else...killed for no good reason while trying to live up to some imaginary standard. At least now, this way, his death has some kind of meaning. He helped save the universe. No Legionnaire could be expected to do more."

Rokk stops to clear his throat as Tinya unashamedly wipes her eyes. Ultra Boy stares transfixed at the floor as Rokk continues.

"I've heard the account of what happened from the others. I know what he told Brek. Pol wanted to do this, for the team, and for himself. You respected his decision, his maturity. And for doing that, I want to thank you, Jo, for myself...and for Pol."

Slowly, Ultra Boy's head raises, his eyes searching for Rokk's. Seeing the affection there, he smiles and embraces his friend in a fierce bear hug. The two men are soon joined by Tinya, each of the three taking this opportunity to draw strength and comfort from their long friendship.

Long seconds pass before Cosmic Boy breaks away from the embrace, his eyes moist. He looks somewhat seriously at Jo, pointing his finger in mock anger.

"And, listen, I don't ever want to hear about that 'second-string Mon-El' garbage again, okay, Legionnaire?"

A broad smile crosses Ultra Boy's face.

"You got it, bossman!"

"Watch it, honey! Jeckie's leader now, and if she hears you, she might get upset! Of course, our former fearless leader could always run again..." chides Tinya.

"Hmmmmm..." replies Rokk with a grin. "Maybe, P.G., maybe. But, to tell the truth, I kinda like the way Sensor Girl drives Timber Wolf and Wildfire crazy!"

The three teammates leave the darkened room, their laughter echoing throughout the bright hallway beyond.

The End

  



End file.
